The Winter Season

I hadn't realised just how long it's been since my last post until last night. There was a plan in place to write one quite some time ago, but life with a very active toddler finds me time and energy poor these days.

So much has happened over the past few months. Jensen is growing up so quickly, (we celebrated his one year corrected birthday with a little cupcake) and is such a joy to be around. He's so happy and inquisitive, adventurous and rambunctious. A little ball of wonder...or should I say a little typhoon that sweeps through leaving a trail of destruction. I have finally given up on the idea of ever having a tidy house again, I pick up after him several times a day to have him behind me creating another wave of mess. Now the house is only tidy from 7pm to 7am, most of which we don't get to enjoy.

He's very good at throwing his toys from his toy box over his shoulder in disregard, in fact often he heaves the toy box over his head, he's so strong. He's started to cock his leg over everything in an effort to climb. He's started climbing the bookshelf, swinging from the dining table, and climbing out of the bath. At first glimpse of this behaviour or rather a prediction of the behaviour to come, I had Phil bolt pretty much all of our furniture to the walls, so we are safe in the knowledge he can't crush himself, but still he needs a careful eye at all times. I'm sure when we return to Gymbaroo in a few weeks, the teacher will be very impressed with his climbing ability, and his physiotherapist and occupational therapist will be pleased also as they have always focused on climbing ability to assess and assist Jensen's coordination. We are very grateful that he hasn't figured out how to climb out of his bed, as this I believe will be the end of any kind of peace. The plan is to keep him in a bag until he does go into a big bed so it is practically impossible anyhow.

With our visit to Dr Bowen, which I mentioned was coming up in the last blog, we had very good feedback and results from the tests. Her jaw dropped as Jensen 'walked' in to her office. Not many premature babies walk as young as he has, although, he can still be quite unstable and trip a lot. We attribute that partly to his lack of peripheral vision and also to his hastiness. He almost seems too small to be walking, as a lot of people comment, and the practicalitlities of holding his hand sometimes give mummy a back ache from leaning down for his little hand. Recently he's started walking around like a penguin flapping his arms in and out, funny little fellow.

So back to Dr Bowen. She performed a number of assesments on Jensen as part of the Bayley Scales Infant and Toddler Development test, to assess his development in all key areas and ranked him according to his ability to respond to her tests. For language and understanding he is on par with his chronological age, and therefore are not correcting his age for this which is fabulous. He's a little behind with his fine motor skills, which I think is due to his vision. We have started seeing an occupational therapist to assist with this, and have seen a marked improvement. Amanda is his OT, whom we did meet briefly in the NICU, she's had a few sessions with Jensen and is very happy overall, although she has alerted us to a thing called vestibular sensory issues. This is the need to constantly move, as upon meeting Jensen she asked if he was like this all the time? I replied yes, to which she asked if I had any support. I have a great deodorant I say....as I seem to just sweat all day chasing after him. From reading up on this, I don't believe this to be a problem for Jensen, as it seems a lot more in depth, but we are aware of it and keeping an eye it, while trying to develop his concentration skills, then again he is only little, and very busy, so in my experience I wouldn't be expecting him to sit and play with one thing for a period of time just yet. Overall, Dr Bowen is very happy with his development, and has suggested some activities to improve his social skills, which we plan on after winter anyhow. It was nice to see a smile on her face, rather than the grim look we used to get in the NICU!

Lately Jensen has a new found love for the playground. We are all having fun exploring different ones in different spots, as well as the trusty local ones. He loves the slippery dip and has a giggle fest on the swing when daddy catches him mid air. He doesn't balk at anything, full throttle into every activity. Shouting go after we say ready? He also loves visiting the zoo, which we try to get to as often as we can. The penguins are a favourite and they are so friendly, hovering for a hello as they zoom through their enclosure. A lot of the animals there are hard to see for Jensen with his vision, especially as they are camouflaged, or too far away, but even animals as large as the elephants he finds hard to spot. I guess they are a dull colour and don't move much, but he likes and can see the seals, meerkats, zebras (when they are close enough), the cable car where we can wave hello, and funnily enough the mountain goats, which strangely are daddy's favourites, but nonetheless, he rides on his bike with the parent handle, and it's a nice outing had by all.

Jensen's language and understanding is just amazing. I said to him the other day as he was ready to rush out the front door, 'you must hold mummy's hand', next thing I knew he had his hand held up ready to hold on. We say 'bedtime', he walks himself up the hallway, 'bath time', into the bathroom, 'give to mummy' he passes the object with a big toothy smile. The only thing he doesn't seem to understand is 'no'....hmmm. He understands requests made by mummy or daddy and answers questions when he can. If he is upset about something, I ask him 'what do you want?', usually his response is 'bikkie', he has become obsessed with bikkies. I've found him quietly having a picnic after helping himself to my bag. He was sat down munching on a biscuit, with a muesli bar in one hand, and a dried apricot in the other. I've started baking gingerbread men and other treats for him, so at least I know what's going in, without halting the biscuit consumption. He now says 'mumma' (finally), and 'daddy work' when he doesn't see him in the morning, he says milk, he says 'buk buk' when I give him a piece of chicken, and says piggy. He's obsessed with piggys, in fact his three favourite things are bikkies, piggys, and books. Just imagine if I could find a book about a pig eating a biscuit!! The pig obsession began when our Vision Australia OT brought a piggy bank game to one of our sessions, I thought it was great to help him with his fine motor skills so went and purchased our own....and boy does he love it. We have also just gained a new member of the family 'Hamilton', a solar panel pig that lives on a rock in the garden, and of course he loves Peppa Pig, which coincidentally has become a lifesaver during periods of fussy eating...

Jensen's love of books has led him to becoming a member of the local library. We are hoping to teach him that books are for reading (which he knows) but they are not for eating, (which he hasn't quite grasped). He would happily read books all day, and often backs himself on to my lap with a book to read. He is also yet to grasp the notion of a library being a quiet place.

My first little haircut

As it has been winter, we have again barricaded ourselves away from the snotty germs that are rife this season. We haven't totally excluded ourselves from society, mainly small people with runny noses, so we are looking forward to starting back at Gymbaroo in a few weeks, and have also found a lovely little playgroup, both of which will help him with socialisation. We were lucky enough to only have one cold, and a cough that lingered, this winter, but overall Jensen did very well, especially with mummy and daddy both having a cold this year. I've read that often a preemies second winter can be where they end up back in hospital. I guess parents can become a little complacent, and not as strict with the rules of socialisation. To be honest, I don't see a time when I won't be. I don't think I'll ever be ok with a snotty child, or otherwise ill person around Jensen, the thought of going back to hospital with him is enough to cancel any social event. We had a catch up with Jensen's first little friend Valentina a few weeks back, it was an event that was cancelled, rescheduled, and cancelled due to colds or sniffles from both parties...two preemies catching up can be very tricky in the winter months, but it was lovely to see her and her parents.

Often when we are at the hospital for blood tests we pop upstairs to visit the nurses in the NICU. On our latest visit, a few of our faves were there and it was lovely to catch up, and for them to see how wonderfully Jensen is growing up. Jill was there and she hadn't seen him for some time. She took him off my hands and entertained him for what seemed like hours, another came and took him off down the hallway to see other nurses at their posts. Dana was there with big open arms for cuddles, and Karen who had him most days in the lead up to being discharged. I can imagine how great it must be for the nurses to see the products of their care, and understand that very few ever step foot through those big heavy doors again, while for us it is very important that he feels at home here, and he understands the importance of those people, that place, and the work they do, that he wouldn't be here without them.

 

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The last little while

One of my favourite books as a child was 'Town mouse and Country mouse'. I can't help but feel like Town mouse, visiting his countryside cousin. Although we've moved just kilometres away and remain in the same suburb, I feel as though we've moved to the bush. We have bush turkeys, possums, bandicoots, and lizards, spiders, frogs and the biggest stick insects you've ever seen. Luckily these are all mostly harmless, but welcome they are not (well not yet anyhow). I've run into many a lizard in our hallway, luckily dodging them before their untimely demise, I unknowingly stroked a frog taking shelter from the rain in our letterbox, and if I had a dollar for every daddy long legs that has been sucked into my vacuum cleaner, we would be very wealthy. But nonetheless we are enjoying our new home and we finally feel like we are almost all settled into our new house. Witnessing the amount of belongings we had stuffed into our 2 bedroom apartment, and just how much effort it was to move it all was incredible, but we are in, unpacked, and trying to fill out the empty spaces with mummy's newfound eBay addiction. We have set up the backyard with loads of equipment for Jensen to climb and play on, as we will be bunking down again for the winter, we thought this a good investment.

Jensen is loving having the extra space, and more access to everything. As we could enclose his area quite well in the apartment, here in our house it's like a free range farm for him, and with this comes the realisation that when standing on tippy toes, he can reach more. There is now also a long list of 'out of bounds' and 'danger zones'.

So Jensen had his first little sleep over at grandma's house the weekend we moved. He of course had a ball and didn't miss us at all, while mummy and daddy were so busy moving all day it wasn't as hard on us as first thought, we missed his little presence around for the day of course, but we thought this a good trial run before our mummy and daddy weekend away.

As last year around both our birthdays Jensen wasn't very well, and with being in hospital and all we didn't really make a big deal of our birthdays, so this year we booked a weekend away up the coast for ANZAC weekend. We lugged most of Jensen's belongings to grandma and grandpa's house and set off for our two nights away. The plan was to just sleep....We had a couple of lazy mornings and wanders around town, a few bevvies and lots of eating (not much else to do in a sleepy coastal town). By Monday morning we were well and truly ready to see our little munchkin so headed back after breakfast. It's lovely not having to worry about him while we're away and that he is having a very enjoyable time with his grandparents and being a very good boy.

Mother's Day was last weekend and it was better spent this year than last. We had planned on going to a special place for brunch but the wait was so long we opted for a burger instead. I must say eating out with Jensen in tow is anything but relaxing. Our food turned up, and before it had been placed on the table, Jensen had grabbed a handful of aioli. He then proceeded to do a loud and smelly poo, soon followed by coughing up a chip he was having trouble swallowing, flying it out of his mouth across the table. Needless to say Phil and I put our half eaten burgers aside and made a move. I got some lovely slippers though and a beautiful card and had a nice afternoon visit from grandma.

Jensen has his first corrected birthday coming up on Friday. We are planning on celebrating with a cake and allowing him to experience his first real cake tasting. With this upcoming milestone, we have many check ups with his medical team. We will be seeing Dr Smith to see how his eyes are going, we have seen his Endocrinologist who says he's growing gorgeously, currently quite tall for his corrected age and on the 10th percentile for his weight and head circumference. While at the appointment Jensen showed evidence of having daddy's genes as he spent a good chunk of the time checking out the pipes underneath the sink. We've had a check up with a paediatric dentist, as Jensen's top teeth have come through with missing enamel. This is because of his prematurity, and because these tooth buds were in formation at the time he was born. No big deal really, just need to take care as they are at a higher risk of tooth decay and breaking should he knock them. We also have a hearing test, baby health centre check, and an appointment with Dr Bowen as part of the NICU follow up program. Dr Bowen was the consultant on rounds when Jensen was born. She gave him 30% chance of survival and advised us to talk with each other about what we'd like to do in regard to resuscitation, and informed us that he would have learning difficulties similar to Down Syndrome, Autism, and a long list of other issues. We are very much looking forward to seeing her and watching her reaction to Jensen's vast vocabulary, and understanding, advanced gross motor skills, and overall intelligence, oh yes...and that he is walking! Yep, that's right, on daddy's birthday this year Jensen took his first little steps at just 11 months corrected. What a little champion we have.

Jensen loves talking, just like his mumma. His current repertoire consists of bubba, baby, bikkie, bot bot, bath, ya (as in karate chop), ball, beer (sounds very like it, but hoping not), and a funny little word that sounds like bitter that he will say all day long. He has recently added dadda to this list, but sadly no inkling of mumma. He tries very hard to say spaghetti, and brush, and bless him tries to mimic a lot of words we say to him. He loves experimenting with sounds and just babbles all day long (a bit like mummy, daddy would say). He is getting very good at walking, although the physio says he has skipped a few steps and moved straight on to walking, whereas he should have mastered standing and rotating beforehand, I think that the clapping and waving that he does while he's walking may not be helping, he just gets so excited the little darling.

Jensen's favourite pastimes currently include bath time (loitering around the edge of the bath several times during the day saying b b b), playing chasings, going through the kitchen cupboards, and playing in his ball pit. This morning I told him to get a book for mummy to read and he did, then I said let's go play with the balls and he crawled off into the playroom to his ball pit. He really has a good understanding of language and is such an interested and bright little boy.

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Sit....stay....lay down

Little man has quickly become obsessed with standing up on everything that is still long enough and insists on doing it all day long. He has been caught balancing a couple of times on his own for very brief moments, but other than that, the rest of the time it's mummy catching him....or not. This morning he tried to pull the television on top of his head, and seems to get himself into a right pickle at every opportunity. He appears very robust though, with only the odd tear here and there if he really hurts himself. He has developed a new habit of standing up in his bed, which he has just taught himself to do while encased in his sleeping bag. We put him in, he stands up, I lay him down, he stands up, I lay him down, he stands up, I leave the room, he whimpers a little, blows some raspberries while flipping about, he goes to sleep. I find that I have resorted to barking dog-like demands at Jensen as I try and keep him safe, uninjured, and well-rested.

Jensen has also started to prefer crawling in the traditional manner, rather than commando style. He's not as fast this way just yet, but is getting there. It's funny to watch him on floorboards as he is unfamiliar with the texture of it and crawls quite cautiously and will remain on his knees the whole time. He also does a funny thing with different textures on his feet, I call it the grass dance. When you stand him up on grass he puts only one foot down at time and lifts the other up to his chin, it looks similar to someone hopping into a bath that's a little too hot, gradually inching in and withdrawing quickly with a sting. He does this on sand, and in the ocean too. Preemies are known to have many sensory issues, but as he is fine with all of these things with his hands, I'm sure it's just something new that he is discovering and will feel comfortable with with more exposure.

He has also started sitting up. Finally!! Just out of the blue, he has decided he enjoys it. Now we can finally have our photo shoot done, as the photographer wanted him to be sitting up before we did them. We are planning on having them taken to celebrate him turning one corrected, which will be in May. He has also started clapping, which just bursts my heart. We have started Gymbaroo classes, which he has been enjoying and during song time I thought I saw him clap after a song, but I wasn't sure if it was an accidental one. We got home that night and at dinner he did it again...little cutie super star.

Jensen is enjoying Gymbaroo. He is not so good at the sitting still and listening part, but likes the exploring equipment part. He likes the tunnels, parachute, and swings the most, but isn't too sure of the trampoline as yet. He also likes being Mr Friendly, crawling over and pulling himself up on the other children in the class and their parents and smiling right in their face.

Thanks to grandma and grandad Jackson we have recently become zoo friends. This means we can go to the zoo every day for a year, if we so please. With Jensen's vision at the moment some of the animals are a little too camouflaged and hard for him to see, but he did see and follow a seal and a penguin as they darted merrily past us. Unfortunately, the lions and tigers have been relocated during enclosure renovations and won't be returning for two years, but there are plenty of other favourites to see and smell.

We recently had a night away in Bowral for a little friend's christening. We had a lovely time away, however little man was a little unsettled and sneakily spent the night in between mummy and daddy. This year Phil and I had decided to go to Fiji to celebrate our upcoming birthdays as last years weren't that great. However, after this little journey we have decided Jensen is not ready to travel and we don't fancy paying for the pleasure of sitting in our hotel room from 7pm each night while our baby slumbers, nor do we want to take it in turns to laze by the pool or beach, so we have decided on a grown up weekend away on the Central Coast instead.

Last week we also went to a low vision playgroup run by Vision Australia. The equipment is all very high contrast and great for his sight development. He shot off and explored the place, and had a fun time. There are only a handful of other children going and I am still paranoid about germs, but as he seemed to enjoy himself, we will go again, but we are planning on going into lockdown again this winter....just to be safe.

Jensen's hair is growing quickly and is almost covering his eyes. It has a unique two-tone appearance with blonde roots and dark tips... His old hair is gradually being taken over by new blonde hair, but there are no plans for a haircut just yet, I'll just have to watch daddy doesn't grab the scissors one day. Also after 3 months of two little pegs, we now have a third one in the form of a big top tooth! Little man is very busy exploring the new feeling by munching on everything in sight, in fact he has become a household silverfish..

We are very excited to announce that we will be moving in the next few weeks to a nice big home with a backyard and lots of space for the little man to grow and run. So please excuse us if there is another delay with the next post.

 

 

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Hip hip hooray! I am one today

In the month since my last post our little mate has come on in leaps and bounds (again)...he is ahead developmentally for his corrected age (8 months), pulling himself up on furniture and standing up already..... however is nowhere near standing unassisted, (which he is learning quickly), as he lets go with his 'look at me face' and plonks to the ground in a twisted ball of arms and legs. He has started puckering up to himself in the mirror and to some favourites of his....luckily these include mummy and daddy, yet Roary the lion seems to get most of his passionate affection.

His palate is developing nicely, and eats all that is given to him...and even some taken from mummy and daddy's plates. He has acquired a taste for Yorkshire puddings, funnily enough, and is doing extremely well with an assortment of finger food. His homework from the physio includes practicing sitting up, however he doesn't seem the least bit interested in doing it by himself.

Our last visit to the ophthalmologist saw Jensen's eyesight improve yet again, this time to 6/90 in both eyes, perhaps even 6/45. We have been patching his right eye for 2 hours a day for the past 6 weeks in order to strengthen his left eye and it has worked wonderfully. We are still looking at glasses and surgery at some point, but not to assist his vision, purely to correct his Strabismus (turned eye). This week we also had a vision assessment with Vision Australia. The results of that were greater than expected. When looking with both eyes Jensen has 6/45, with his right alone, 6/75 and his left 6/90. Obviously a much better outcome than expected by the orthoptist and occupational therapist, as they had to adjust their assessment resources and methods accordingly. In the end, Jensen could even see hundreds and thousands in the orthoptist's hand, and we are told that Jensen's vision is well within the normal range for his corrected age, which is just the best news ever! Another assessment in 12 months is all that is required, and of course to continue patching.

In other news..... This week our precious little baby boy turned one. Wow! What a milestone...

It's hard to believe that he has been with us for a year. It's hard to believe it's been a year since his shocking entry into this world, but I guess that's because we spent a good chunk of it in hospital with him, and without him. Of course that part of the year felt like five, but since we've been home together it's just flown.

One thing that got Phil and I through our time in hospital was the promise of having a massive party for Jensen's first birthday on Australia Day this year....so that's exactly what we did. For weeks we scoured local parks looking for a suitable venue, one we knew would be available, not crowded, and suited our needs. We decided on a BBQ brunch, knowing there would be more chance of reserving an area earlier rather than later, as BBQs are quite a popular event on this particular holiday. The next worry was the weather...it had rained and rained for days, off and on, with little pockets of sunshine and hope. The forecast was not looking good. We'd organised a couple of gazebos, and we had a roof over the area, but a party in the park in the rain.....not ideal! The night before the party, the biggest thunderstorm we've seen in a while was upon us and with it, downpours of rain. Our balcony was near flooding as we prayed to Jensen's angels....'we don't need sunshine, we just need no rain'.

What a cracker of a day it was....not only was it dry (some ominous looking clouds loitering around at times), but it was filled with sunshine and warmth, just like our boy and his angels beaming down on us. Phil set off at 7am to secure our spot and set about decorating, while I applied the finishing touches to the birthday cake and other tasty treats, and the birthday boy enjoyed his slumber. A small altercation with the Ranger regarding our choice of decorations, and the place looked beautiful....just how I had imagined...thanks to daddy.

The party went well, all seemed to enjoy themselves, and were filling their tummys with food and ears with conversation. A game of cricket and a sporadic frisbee thrown here and there and you have yourself a successful party. Not your average baby's first birthday party, with 60 guests, but we all know our Jensen is not your average baby, and there were some big celebrations to be had. It was lovely to see all of those that came, and especially nice to see some little friends from the NICU all doing well and looking happy. We've managed to raise another $500 for the NICU so thank you to all that donated. That's it for the parties for now I'm afraid, there won't be another such celebration until Jensen's 18th now....

For me personally, Jensen turning one signifies the end to a traumatic year, a year of new and frightful experiences, thoughts, and feelings I never again wish to experience. A year of uncertainty, nervousness, vulnerability, insecurity, and stress, yet a year of much joy, happiness, and laughter that only a child can bring to your life. For me it's now time to move on, and try to not let these memories dominate my mind any longer. To concentrate on my beautiful baby and my beautiful partner. To look after myself again, them, and us, and find my way back to the me I was before January 26th 2015....or at least try!

Happy first birthday our precious beautiful boy, mummy and daddy love you so very much xox

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Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Merry Christmas everyone, and a happy new year to you all! We hope you've had a lovely Christmas and are enjoying some time off with family.

Jensen, Phil, and I had a lovely first Christmas together as a little family. It started a week early with a road trip down south to Great Nanna's house to celebrate Christmas with the James'. This has become an annual event for the family, and we enjoy getting away for the weekend, catching up with family, and also try our luck at catching a fish or two. This year, we extended our trip for a night, so we had a good little break. We learned quickly that the amount of things required for baby on a trip, means that a weekend away is almost not worth the effort of packing, loading and reloading, so it will be sometime before we hit the road again, however Jensen settled in nicely and did very well sleeping in his portacot and a strange environment, and was full of smiles for the family.

With Great Nanna

On Christmas eve, we paid a visit to the nurses in the NICU and took them a box of treats to get them through the festive season, which we are planning on doing each year. It's always so nice to see everyone, and they love seeing Jensen and how big he is getting. Each time we go, we see a different bunch of nurses, so hopefully it will work out that we will eventually see them all.

Merry Christmas Aunty Nurse

We spent Christmas Eve and Christmas night at Grandma and Grandpa James' house. We woke on Christmas morning to find not only a mammoth mountain of gifts under the tree, but that Santa had left one of his elves behind.

Jensen had loads of fun opening his gifts, be it by ripping, or licking, and has been very spoilt by everyone (luckily mummy and daddy still had the travel pod on the roof of the car to transport all these gifts home), and played with his new toys, AND the packaging! His new tunnel was certainly a winner, and kept him entertained and busy like a hamster on a wheel for ages... He also likes the scooter/bike/vespa thing that Santa gave him...

Of late Jensen has had a few new experiences....he has tried his first lamb chop, moving on to a sausage, and now some toast. He seems to enjoy feeding himself, and making a mess, however, just needs to get a better grip on the chewing before swallowing thing....a couple of scary moments for mum and dad. He also enjoys munching on mango in his net feeder, he seems to just love it, making 'num' noises while eating....

Another new experience for him, which is not all that pleasant, is having his eye patched for two hours a day. Dr Smith, his ophthalmologist, suggested we do this with his right eye, to encourage his left eye to catch up to his right. Currently he has 6/90 vision in his right eye, (an improvement from 6/180) and 6/180 in his left (no improvement from last check). This means that what I can see from 180 metres, Jensen can see from 6 metres. His eyesight is still developing and we will be working with Dr Smith, and Vision Australia to further develop his vision.